{ DREAMING }

I SHOULD BE SLEEPING RIGHT NOW BUT I AM GIVING MYSELF 30 MORE MINUTES TO GET MYSELF IN BED..I HAVE GOT A LOT DONE TONIGHT BUT I REALLY NEED TO BE FORCING MYSELF TO GET SOME SLEEP..

I NEED TO GO TO THE POST OFFICE TOMORROW AND ALSO TRY TO GET A FEW OTHER THINGS DONE WHEN I AM OUT SO I DONT WANT TO SLEEP IN TOO LATE. NOT TO MENTION I REALLY NEED TO WASH SOME BEDDING AND THAT WILL TAKE UP A LOT OF TIME. BUT I WANT MY BLANKETS SMELLING SUPER FRESH..I HATE IT BECAUSE ITS A HEAVY JOB. IT ALWAYS STRAINS MY ARMS PICKING UP THOSE BIG BLANKETS AND THEN TRANSFERRING THEM FROM THE WASHER TO THE DRYER IS NOT TOO EASY EITHER.. O -WELL.. GOT TO DO IT .=(

I WANTED TO EXPLAIN TO YOU GUYS THAT THE TENSION AROUND THE HOUSE IS DYING DOWN. MOST OF THE TENSION THAT WAS HERE WAS BROUGHT ON BY MYSELF..YES ITS BEEN A DEPRESSING FEW DAYS BUT I AM WORKING HARD ON NOT LETTING MYSELF GET DEPRESSED BECAUSE SOMETHING HAPPENED THAT WAS SAD. I HAVE HAD TO FIGHT DEPRESSION ALL MY LIFE.. CANT REALLY EXPLAIN IT BUT ITS THERE. AND IT COMES AND GOES ALL ON ITS OWN. BUT INSTEAD OF LAYING IN BED SLEEPING DAY AND NIGHT I HAVE FORCED MYSELF TO GET UP AND PUT ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF THE OTHER AND GET AT LEAST THE HOUSE BACK TOGETHER. AND IT REALLY DID HELP. JUST FORCING MYSELF TO DO STUFF WHEN I AM SO NOT WANTING TO WORKED.. SO THAT IS WHAT I AM CONCENTRATING ON..JUST TRYING TO GET THINGS TO MY NORMAL BACK.

TRYING TO BE MORE POSITIVE. ITS NOT EASY.. MY ATTITUDE IS NATURALLY KINDA SOMBER MOST THE TIME.. DEPRESSION KICKS IN AND IM A ZOMBIE. SO TODAY WAS A IMPROVEMENT AND I HOPE TOMORROW IS AN IMPROVEMENT TOO. I GUESS THATS ALL ANY OF US CAN ASK FOR. I KNOW I LOVE MY KIDS, MY HUSBAND AND MY FAMILY AND THAT IS WHAT IS GOING TO HAVE TO PULL ME THROUGH WHAT EVER HARD TIMES I AM GOING THROUGH..

THE SUN WILL BE UP IN A FEW HRS AND THAT BRINGS WITH IT A NEW DAY..

THE GUYS WERE JUST A LITTLE LATE TONIGHT. AND MY FRIEND GOT HERE AROUND 530..WE HAD A GREAT DINNER AND THEN EVERYONE KINDA DID THEIR OWN THING FOR THE NIGHT. SCOTT FINALLY GOT THE BLACK OPTS FOR WIII AND HE WAS PLAYING IT FOREVER. I DIDNT REALLY MIND.. I LAID IN A BIG BUBBLE BATH AND READ A BOOK..IT FELT AMAZING..AND IT WAS SUPER RELAXING. I WAS READY FOR BED AFTER THAT POINT BUT I HAVE STAYED UP..EVERYTHING IS DONE AND READY FOR MORNING AND I JUST HAVE TO TURN OUT THE LIGHTS AND HEAD TO BED.

I GOT A LOT OF POST DONE.. SOME OF THEM I AM REALLY EXCITED ABOUT. I HAVE TO TON MORE JUST FLOWING FROM MY HEAD.. I DONT KNOW IF I CAN GET THEM ALL DOWN BEFORE I FORGET THE IDEAS.. SO I GUESS I BETTER BE JOTTING THEM DOWN!

WELL MY 30 MINUTES IS ALMOST UP.

OH..I WAS GOING TO MENTION SOMETHING SOONER BUT I FORGOT. I HAVE A REALLY REALLY GOOD FRIEND WHO IS EXPERIENCING A BROKEN HEART OF SORTS. SO IF YOU WOULDNT MIND SAY A PRAYER FOR HER.. PAIN IS PAIN.. WE ALL FEEL IT..AND WE ALL KNOW HOW LOW THAT BRING YOU TOO. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE...LOVE YOU.. CALL IF YOU NEED TO TALK..

I AM HEADING TO BED..

SWEET DREAMS..

K JAGGERS

♥