Hello everyone. I hope you are having a wonderful Sunday. I stayed up super late last night and it took forever for me to fall asleep. I think it was after 5am before I really got into a deep sleep. So understandably, I am running a slow today. Scott got up early and kinda hosted a pre golf breakfast and had a 9am tee time. I know he was up late too so I am guessing he will be napping while I am doing the grocery shopping later. Here lately, it seems like I have been had some pretty evil energy around me. You know those people who put their negativity in your life and if your not careful....you will let it in; and then it can spread. We all see evil everyday on the news don't we? Its here rather we want it or not. But what happens when it shows up in your life? For me there have been a few things that have happened. At first, I was struck off guard. Then I got angry and once that happened...it took a while to clam down and figure out how to deal with it. First I know God does not give us more than we can handle. I know that. I also know that life is a big classroom filled with numerous lessons for us all. But I fell short and thought handling it with my fast acting temper could combat evil and negative energy. All that did was get me worked up and still the energy was around. Not only did it surround me in a sense but it was starting to dwell inside me. It seeps in whenever you least expect it. Once I was able to have a clear thought...actually many clear thoughts I put together a plan to rid myself of all that energy and to focus on better things. One of the first things I did was have a serious conversation with my husband about what I was feeling and who I was feeling it about. It was brutally honest conversation that we had. We talk about everything and knowing I could tell him what I was thinking and feeling helped a lot. I then had a decision to make. Let this energy fill our home and our lives or to fight back. I am choosing to fight back. What does that mean?? I am certainly not going to actually be fighting anyone. But I am going to fight for my family, our happiness, our lives with grace. I have fallen short with grace when evil showed itself in whatever form. 
I have said it over and over { maybe one day my brain will understand it } but we can't choose what others do but we can choose how we handle and or react to it. I am so emotional most of the time which makes it hard to see clear in difficult times. I can still stand up and fight off all the negative energy but in a way that is graceful and not distasteful. Sometimes I will get right in the gutter and fight back. I was made that way but I think one of the biggest lessons of my life is learning not to fight back. Be graceful. Everyday its a challenge. Its easy to love your kids. Its easy to love your parents. Its easy to love your husband/wife but its its not easy to be loving when faced with a horrible person. Love is not the first thing that comes to my mind in those kind of situations. Mercy is not something I think of often either. Most of us want mercy shown to us when we are having a difficult day so why is harder to give it for others? Another thing I am trying to do to keep the negative evil energy away to simply not let it in our home. Our home is our sanctuary. Its the one soft spot for Scott, myself and the kids to be so we have to be careful with the energy in the house. I think each person is responsible for the energy they bring into our home. I also think its up to us...the adults to always be mindful of how negative energy can quickly move in. As many of you know Scott's ex has been giving us all kinds of problems here lately. We could let that suck the life out of us but instead we are pushing that negative evil energy away. Simple as that. When I don't put grace first, it always always comes out worse. And believe me I am not very graceful when challenged. Its just not in my DNA. So like many of you... I am constantly learning how to cope better, how to love harder and how to forgive more. I think I like Eckhart Tolle's quote on grace the best....
I strive.. I want.. I need a resistance free life. I have a feeling I have a much longer journey ahead of me until I have that grace, ease and lightness. I think the important thing is...we all keep trying. Thanks for coming and visiting today. I hope you have a beautiful and blessed Sunday!
